Ya know, I didn't completely hate the LOD vs. DOA brawl and since that really is saying something I'm gonna put 'em in the It Worked! category this week. For the most part it was your typical no-sellathon but didja notice how everybody went down at the end, selling that they might actually be hurt? Besides that minor miracle, the foreign object shots were pretty good and Chainz put in the extra effort by taking a ride on that...thing. The Undertaker walking right through everybody was stupid but it was cool to see Brian Lee and 'taker rekindle the old Underfaker feud from a few years back. Darren Drozdov's gimmick of puking on camera is kind of lame but he could at least eat a coupla burritos beforehand to add some colour to his vomitus.

The Undertaker did a really hokey shoot&work interview and didn't do a good job of keeping his southern accent quiet. I kind of dug it since it was a change from his usual rambling on about the dark side. Vince did a nice job as well but I'll be the first to admit that he's beginning to overexpose himself. Well, maybe not the first.

The Nation vs. DX 6-man elimination match was good enough. Yep, the old run-in finish reared its ugly head but at least Shamrock hadn't been on TV in about a month and Severn doing a run-in wearing a suit was great. He was all fired up like an irate high school principal. Elimination matches always come across as goofy when not given enough time because everyone gets pinned quick and they end up looking bad. Hey, the people may love Maivia's stylin' elbow drop but I really think it sucks. Check out Paul Orndorff's take on the move, which is so much better. Owen Hart didn't look as lost as in previous weeks but he still ain't back in form. Everyone else did ok, but DX needs a more interesting feud.

Sho Funaki vs. TAKA Michinoku was another cool little spurt of a match from the big boys of north eastern wrestling but it pales in comparison with their mammoth match from last December. Of course that one had psychology and selling along with the highspots. It's a real shame that McMahon is willing to give Jackyl's Human Oddities a long segment to get themselves over but uses the Kaientai feud as filler between commercials. And some feud, huh? TAKA's already cleanly pinned Togo and Funaki in under four minutes each. Where's the heat? Oh, not that I didn't like Jackyl et al last week, 'cos I did, I just like these guys a whole lot more.

The Vince McMahon as hero of the world promo was good and funny.

Kane vs. Undertaker was pretty watchable for a crappy big man match. Vince reminded me that I'm glad he's no longer a TV announcer 'cos he sucked and it's gonna kill his heat if he does that too often, or even again. Steve Austin on the other hand is god damned great calling a match because he actually sounds like he's getting into it and sells that to the audience at home. Austin seemed to raise Jim Ross' game a level and they were both fun to listen to. Lawler was happy to drown with McMahon. Kind of a surprise finish. I suppose that with the lack of serious title contenders to Austin's belt, Kane makes a reasonable choice. It looked like they went to the finish a little early because there was a lot of padding in the post-match Mankind/Undertaker brawl which lost steam before the show went off the air.

For once Jim Ross didn't say that business was about to pick up. Unless I just missed it.

Jacqueline as Marc Mero's new valet didn't seem to get any heat and she came off flat. Ha ha. Mero vs. Blackman was a pretty uninspiring little affair but the finish was cool with the shooting star press and all.

I liked Faarooq kicking the shit out of the sack they call Jeff Jarrett but that was one of the worst finishes all year. Jarrett knocked him out with a freaking belt buckle? The fuck? Oh, and thank god Henry and Phineous are finally getting the big break they deserve with their kick ass new gimmick. Dip that in heavy sarcasm.

Mark Henry pinned Terry Funk clean? Why did this match even happen? I kept thinking, ok, how are they going to have Funk go over and look good. I didn't even consider that Henry would win. Terry has come a long way in a short time from holding the ECW world title to lying down for the NOD job boy. It's a damn shame.

Ollie

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