The Monday Nitro Workrate Report
A weekly look at what did and didn't work on Monday Nitro by Dean Rasmussen
Monday, August 24th, 1998
This wasn't horrible because it had LOTS of wrestlers in matches, but it
wasn't a lot of wrestles I dig a whole lot for the most part. People spoke
quite a bit but I refuse to slow down my Fast forward for that (though I
noticed at work that Bischoff mentioning Eddy's name focused a lot of
attention on that little deal- as I was asked more than once if Eddy
Guerrerro was leaving by the burly Goldberg loving contingents of the guys
out in the field. I read the internet so they figure I'm more INSIDE and
thus I can tell them all the wrong rumors I read online.:)) Anyways...
What Worked
Mike Enos is a good worker and Wrath did his Kanyon Jr impersonation as he
continues to be the best stiff in wrestling today- finally bypassing Davey
Boy Smith. Enos works stiff and takes some bumps. Wrath does the slightly
cool slingshot elbow and the fancyshmancy Misawa Driver. I got no beef with
this. It made the permanent tape.
Malenko vs Kaz Hayashi was a good match, though Kaz seems to making the
adjustment from RULING it in New Japan's larger rings lately to ruling it in
the confines of WCW's tiny rings. I was hoping against ALL hope that Kaz
and WCW were going to do the SUPERCOOL thing of having Kaz beat Malenko with
the Crippler Crossface since Kaz stole the move and then found a thousand
goofball ways to go into it. Kaz did hit the SWANK ###SHHOOCCCKKKEEERRR$$$
Tope and killed the livin heck out of Malenko. They went to the mat and I
was digging it. WCW almost even gave it enough time and I was digging it.
The announcers tried to put over Hayashi and I was digging it. Malenko gets
the big pop for the TCL and I was digging it. I was digging it. Kaz needs
to get over QUICK now that everybody is graduating to carrying stiffs at the
top (Malenko, Jericho, Chavo, and Eddy soon with Benoit starting there long
ago), and Juventud and Rey are the new basis of the division. Psicosis,
Kidman, Lizmark Jr, Magnum Tokyo and Hayashi need to be the next wave of
Cruisers to get over and supply the goods and then Ultimo will be back and
they will have a real cool division again but with a totally new complexion.
This would be the upside of having the most talented roster on earth.
Hey! Jericho the heavyweight drags something good out of the usually
totally Rotundoesque Hennig. This was stiff and Hennig tried stuff he
hasn't tried in years and if Hennig keeps getting into the ring with these
NJ Junior alumni, he may get forced to being good again. We'll see. Yep.
What Didn't Work
I'm totally indifferent to Konan in the ring usually. He doesn't suck but
he isn't very graceful or sharp. BUT THE OLD ANVIL IS A WHOLE DIFFERENT
SPICY BATCH OF NOODLES! Goddam, why doesn't he frickin retire already?
Anvil is the Biggest Boil on the big fat Boil-encrusted ass of WCW- in a
wrestling sense. I'm sure he's a swell guy and all, but I'm a real swell
guy too but I don't force y'all to watch ME attempt to wrestle.
Bret Hart didn't wrestle Booker T. Instead they put the shining jewel in
the nWo Tiara of Total Suckass Wrestlers RIGHT INTO PLACE! YES! Welcome
Stevie Ray- to the nWo! May you room with Bryan Adams and his gun and
steroid collection. May you go barhopping and find that August/December
romance that your new compadre Scott Hall found. May you have a fine, fine
run as a true nWoite. Just NEVER have a match against ANYBODY I care about
again, EVER. Including your WAAAAAY more talented brother. Duggan vs Stevie
Ray- THERE'S a fued for ya, young graduate! Thank you.
Mongo vs Riggs actually came pretty close to working in a "Look at Riggs
almost Carry the Thoroughly Ungood Mongo" kind of way. I mean, Mongo is
like Luger; they both seem to try REAL hard and I can't hate them because of
it- but, just like Luger, Mongo is a Long Tall Glass of Suckass in the ring
and Riggs is a damn good worker- but we're talking
Lyger/Kawada/Koshinaka/Blue Panther/Bret Hart level order to carry Mongo.
And Riggs- though I think he's pretty underrated- ain't CLOSE to that
league. The run-in at the end was fun and gives Malenko something to do and
it gives WCW an angle to drag out forever until Benoit and/or Flair comes back.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Bryan Adams vs Lex Luger! HAHA|HA|HAHAHAHAHAHA!
Ooohhhhh... WCW, you kidder! With that "nerve hold" for eight minutes! Oh
geez. HA HAHAHAHAH AHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHA!... and... and... that CLOTHESLINE!
Hoo-boy. In case you were ever wondering just how motherfucking GREAT Dean
Malenko and Bret Hart are, notice that they had actual GOOD interesting
matches with these two loads of shit, while Luger and Adams left to their
own devices can serve up a turd of such Air Supply Boxset proportions like this.
THERE YOU HAVE IT.
DEAN!
