KAZ HAYASHI! and JUSHIN THUNDER LIGER! go at it! Brazilian guys beat each other up! MEIKO SATOMURA! and SONOKO KATO! go at it! TOMMY DREAMER! stinks! SCOTT NORTON! stinks!
Aloha~!
WELCOME TO DEATH VALLEY DRIVER VIDEO REVIEW #85!
THE DEALS THAT WERE MADE: Rev Ray and I had to decide who was gonna review
what from the FAT ASS batch of Indie, NPW-esque stuff from Minnesota that King Of
Men Tracy Thom sent in to the DVDVR Corporate headquarters- I opted for the Buck
Zhumoff intensive SECTION as a prep for the mountains of AWA that will be
forthcoming. REVRAY goes at the other two in this here DVDVR and IÕll contend with
the beauty of Minnesota Indie WRESTLING next time round. Naimark continues his
journey to the darkest side of shootstyle and the Ripper was all afraid of the LLPW this
time around. Schneider was at a bridge tourney in Orlando but he got in the beginning of
all that NJ analysis from the beloved Glenn Tapes. Speaking of the youngster who made
Charles Goren weep the bitter tears of defeat....
!@!@!@ NEW JAPAN TV- 10/10/98 (taped 9/23 from Yokohama)
(byPHIL SCHNEIDER)
Brian Johnson/ Don Frye vs Kauzo Yamazaki/ Kensuke Sasaki:
I love Don Frye, sure he is involved in the stupid, insanely over booked UFO angle (Last
week on UFO is OFU, Fujita is depressed about losing his challenge match to Orlando
Weit and he threatens to commit Hari Kari) and sure he isn't that good of a worker but he
is just such a dick, he gets about the most legitimate heel heat I have ever seen, gives
classic interviews and can really kick everyoneÕs Ass. Despite the greatness that is Frye
this match kind of stunk. Brian Johnson looks like a shootstyle Uncle Fester and his
singlet and gi pants look like a wife beater and acid washed jeans, his kicks suck and he is
so plodding he makes Tachichikari look like Dragon Kid. I don't hate Sasaki like a lot of
people do, but he wasn't worth much in this match, although he did hit a cool deadlift
powerbomb out of a cross armbreaker. Yamazaki was just there. They did have the surly
Don Frye pull apart brawl after the match, no cursing interview though.
Black Tiger/ Chris Jericho vs Shinjiro Ohtani/ Testuhito Takiawa:
This was pretty beautiful, all four guys were feeling it and Jericho and Eddie were working
together really well, hitting the somersualt senton Demoltion backbreaker, and the Gringos
Locos superplex/frog splash combo. Ohtani responded to that coolness by busting out the
super stiff springboard dropkick and the world beating rotation powerbomb. Takiawa
stayed out of the way and didn't Choshu the thing to death, the only flaw in this baby was
Ohtani selling the Liontamer like a chin lock, but I guess no one cued him in to the fact it
was Jericho's finisher. It was real nice to see Eddie and Chris get a chance to flow for a
while with world class workers.
Scott Norton vs Yuji Nagata:
Bleeeeurp, that is the sound of my vomit hitting the floor. This was the worst IWGP title
match I have ever seen. Norton must be a member of the X-Men or something as normal
wrestling has no effect on him. Nagata kicks him in the head, nothing, Nagata back
suplexes him Norton gets up and screams, triangle choke must have been like a slightly
tight necktie because it didn't effect Scotty. Boy, Norton really revealed all of the Secrets
of Professional Wrestling, what a no-sellling roided out sack of shit. Nagata should go
back to WCW, at least Glacier sold his offense before he beat him. Norton has now
moved past Shat Ernest Miller to NUMBER 1 on my Wrestlers I Hate list. FUCK YOU
SCOTT, SHOOT SHINYA SHOOT!!
#$#$#$#$#$#$# GAEA G-Panic! #12- 10/5/98.
(by REV RAY!)
We're joined in the studio by Meiko Satomura who's hair has grown out so it doesn't look
as odd as it did a few shows ago.
AAAW Tag Title Match- Sugar Sato/Chikako Nagashima vs Aja Kong/Mayumi Ozaki:
For those of you not up on your GAEA background, here's a little review. Sato and
Nagashima are part of Ozaki's OZ Academy heel group in GAEA. Ozaki brought in Aja
after her previous old cranky woman of wrestling, Akira Hokuto got pregnant (and
recently had her son, so hopefully we'll see her again. After all, retirements in wrestling
aren't definite until the person's buried in the cold, cold ground. I'll believe Hogan useless
ass is out of wrestling the day he's buried.) Aja and Oz won a tournament to face the
Oz-ites for the tag titles. Sugar is in control early, but blows a spot where she jumps off
the top rope, catches Aja's leg and hits a Dragonscrew, so Aja sets it up while they're both
standing on the mat. The young spunky punkettes beat on Aja with some double teams
including an assisted somersault double stomp by Nagashima that had to suck to no end to
take. Oz saves her partner. Aja gives Nagashima a backdrop driver for a two and tags
Oz. Oz ends up getting oil canned by Aja by mistake allowing Nagashima to hit a
Fisherman Buster for two. Sugar tried to powerbomb her partner onto Oz, but Oz rolls
away and powerbombs Nagashima on the back of her neck in a most henious way. Sugar
runs in, gets canned by Aja. Aja superplexes Oz onto Sugar. Oz goes for her Tequila
Sunrise, Nagashima saves her partner with a Release German. Oz recovers, she goes for it
again, Sugar breaks and teases a TS of her own, Aja goes for the save and Urakens Oz in
the back of the head, letting Sugar hit Lygerbomb for 2 as Aja makes the save.
Nagashima holds Aja so Sugar can take her out with some so so urakens. Aja gets sent
outside and Nagashima ends up killing herself with a Tope Suicida when her feet get
caught on the ropes. With Nagashima dead on the floor and Aja standing on her, Oz puts
away her copy cat protege with the Tequila Sunrise to win the titles. Post match, Aja
looks like she's sucking it in so the belt will fit. There's also the great pose where Aja
holds Oz in her arms like she was a body builder and Oz was her 100 pound bikini
girlfriend at the beach. Write your own jokes here folks, but it was a great picture I'm
sure. Good match, with Sugar and Nagashima being all spunky and Aja and Oz not being
afraid to sell for them.
AAAW Title match- Devil Masami vs Chigusa Nagoya:
Devil's right shoulder is all taped up. Devil uses powermoves, Chigusa uses her kicks.
Devil starts working for a sleeper, Chigusa fights for a piledriver, which she gets on her
second attempt. Devil Dragonscrews out of a Nagoya kick and goes lariat crazy. They
end up out on the apron with Chigusa getting control with some lariats, laying Devil
across the buckles and ax kicking her. Chigusa with a running powerbomb for two, then a
Death Valley Driver for two. Top rope elbow for 2 until Devil rolls through it into a
sleeper. Devil lets go, hits some kicks and enzu-lariats Chigusa out to the apron. Devil
hits a top rope overhead belly to belly which Chigusa no sells, but walks right into a
Somoan drop. Devil hits a Rolling Senton off the top, though the announcers were calling
for a rolling leg drop, so I don't know if it was a blown move or not. Devil with a DVD
for two. Devil goes for a Tigerdriver, but Chigusa flips out of it and slaps on a sleeper for
the win and the title.
Sonoko Kato vs Meiko Satomura:
Kato and Satomura are usually tag partners, but for some reason unknown to me because
I don't speech Japanese and I haven't seen a post by the guy who translates everything
from GAEA tv into English for this show, they've had a falling out. Kato jumps Satomura
right at the bell with a German suplex, throws her outside and hits a springboard rolling
senton to the floor and the action is on. This is pretty damn sweet because both girls are
damn good. There's lots of counters to each other's signature moves since they know each
other so well. Satomura does a Pele' impression and whacks Kato with a bicycle kick to
her shoulder. They trade kicks, then take it to the mat. Satomura starts working on
Kato's legs. The tape jumps ahead to the 10 minute mark, Satomura knocks Kato off the
top to to the floor and hits her Windmillin' Elbow off the apron. Satomura works for a
top rope move, but Kato keeps fighting her, resulting in Satomura pulling out The Claw
which- for some unknown reason- is getting a resurgence in Japan. Satomura works the
legs, goes for the cross armbreaker, but Kato counters it into a pinfall attempt. Kato goes
for a running powerbomb, but Meiko knows to counter it. They run through about 4 or 5
of their signature spots, all of which get countered until Satomura comes up with a
wakigatime. Jump ahead to the 18 minute mark, Kato in control sends Satomura to the
floor and drops 2 leg drops and a double stomp off the apron until Satomura recovers and
uses an armscissor take down from the apron to the floor into a cross armbreaker which
the ref has to break up. Satomura gets caught up top into Kato's second rope somersault
fallaway slam. Kato with a rolling senton for two. Satomura blocks out of Kato's Dragon
Suplex attempts and in an exchange comes up with a cross armbreaker variation which
Kato rope saves out of. Satomura runs into a high roundhouse kick and gets Dragon
Suplexed for two. They fight back and forth with both being exhausted and not really
being able to press an advantage. Kato runs into a DVD. Satomura works her over with
elbows. Kato falls down after getting whipped to the ropes. Satomura seems to be in
control for the most part, even though both are really hurting. After beating the crap out
of each other, the match ends in a 30 minute time limit draw and both girls shake hands
while down on the match. Definitely a whole lot of coolness with lots of counters and lots
of cool moves.
Bad Nurse Nakamura vs Meiko Satomura:
Rie Nakamura's back in her heel personality, chewing on a picture of Satomura as she
comes to the ring. Apparently, Satomura's head's in season, so Nakamura decides to
tenderize it a bit with a fork. Satomura's head is finger lickin' good and Nakamura loves
the taste. Nakamura acts all mysterious... or stoned... one of those. Satomura steals
Nakamura's Kendo stick and uses it on her. This is pretty much Bad Nurse using objects,
with Satomura occassionally coming up with holds to counter before Bad Nurse busts her
up with a weapon. Nakamura spits mist twice in the match and gets the win the a cross
arm breaker... I guess it keeps Nakamura over as a threat in the division even though I
think beating up like this is more fitting for someone like say... Matsumoto. Or Tanny
Mouse, that's it, they can bring in Tanny Mouse to take garbage league beatings like this.
Clips of Bad Nurse beating Sakura Hirota (who's wearing an outfit which looks like it
belongs on a two year old girl at the kiddie pool) and Chikako Nagashima play before
Sonoko Kato stops the madness and the Bad Nurse winning streak with a Dragon suplex.
I am now in the proud possession of a Suzanne Sommers "Buttmaster" commercial in
Japanese. And it can tighten the chest. I am the luckiest boy in the world. Ok, I'm the
sad, sad man.
Meiko Satomura vs Manascreami Toyota:
You know, if I had my way, the "my offense has yet to evolve due to the fact that I really
shouldn't be doing so much aerial offense anymore" Toyota would be putting over the
young and impressive Satomura. But I don't have my way. Satomura gets Toyota in a
cross armbreaker which the great(ly overrated) Toyota seems to sell like she's in a side
headlock. Satomura hits a windmillin' elbow off the post to the floor on Toyota. Toyota
doesn't seem to want to sell a whole lot in this and she uses a Rolling Cradle so she burns
up a bunch of what little love I have for her in this. Satomura counters an Ocean Cyclone
Suplex attempt into a DVD. Toyota eventually hits the Ocean Cyclone for the win.
Clips of Nagashima/Sato v. Nagoya/Hirota where Chigusa gets lygerbombed by Sato, but
turns it into a cross armbreaker for the win. Hirota v. Ozaki where Hirota uses the "Look!
A baby wolf!" trick to sucess. Hirota hits a Tequila Sunrise, which Oz kicks out of. Oz
wins with one of her own.
Overall, a pretty cool 2 hours. I always look forward to GAEA and the Kato/Satomura
and the tag title match delievered the goods.
!@!@!@!@!@ MICHINOKU LUCHA TV #13
(byDEAN RASMUSSEN)
TEAM SASUKE hasnÕt hit the Glenn tapes yet so this is gonna be quite mixed bag as MP
has been all year. As usual, the swankiest thing is the Lucha that Hamada serves up from
CMLL, as they do a Show Within A Show as they got the CMLL in Japan in 1998 and
WE GET TO WATCH! WOO-HOO! (The whole Magilla kicks off with the Relay
Runner Guy having a fifty-eight minute match against the Transvestite Guy! THATÕS
RIGHT, FELLAS! Become one with the Fast Forward, my child...)
Gran Hamada/ Super Delfin/ Shinzaki vs Hidaka /Yakushiji /Hoshikawa:
This was pretty good for the cold as a 45 minute old cup of coffee style match one usually
gets from MP these days. Shinzaki works a little as they continue to push Hoshikawa as
the next big face in the promotion as he gets in lotsa of lowgrade offense in on his
Crappiness, the Big Star That Was Supposed To Be Shinzaki. Hidaka gets to shed his
BattlARTS bonds and BE the Flyer he can BE! He and Hamada do some neato stuff.
Delfin tries to Togo something good out of the listless Yakushiji and takes decent little
tope from the Green-clad freak. The ending is pretty hot as they Michinoku Pro the fudge
out of the ending by having everybody go for their assorted and sundry finishers but have
save after save after save. Shinzaki finally gets his cool-ass camel clutch on Yakushiji and
we call it a night OH WAIT! Hoshikawa kicks him right in the head and Delfin and
Hidaka end up in the ring! WOW! Now THATÕS a shitty looking shotay and NOW we
call it a night! Not bad at all and I was ready to Glaze Right Over when this started.
Great Sasuke vs Hoshikawa:
They show about a minute of clips of this and I cannot for the life of me figure out why
they didnÕt show all of this. This is HoshikawaÕs first big win over Sasuke and they just
show the random highlights? Maybe Sasuke is crazy.
Great Sasuke/Tiger Mask vs Sasuke the Great/Masked Tiger:
This is the infamous Sasuke turn and itÕs a big batch of fun. Tiger Mask IV has really
worked his way over my Giant Personal Wall Of Loathing And Resentment (tm Bryan
Clouse ((You donÕt know him))) and he and Takeshi Ono beating the shit out of each
other has been fun for about a year and a half now. This is Mascara contra Macara and
should be a WHOLE lot better than it is but the key to this match is the Mountain of
Inconsistency called Orihara. I think he used up his good match quota with that great
match against Yasuraoka in WAR last year. Anyway, he is NOTHING in this match and
the fact that he doesnÕt try to match highspots with Sasuke means that he is quite the
suckass drag on the lightspeed this match would need to take to generate the heat it needs
to generate. But he is and he doesnÕt and he is and it doesnÕt so there you go. Sasuke and
Ono have some quality moments as Takeshi actually feels the need to hold up his end of
the rudo bargain and kicks the shit out of some folks and Sasuke does some tricky
standing switches into some Lucha coolness. HEY! Tigermask with the Tiger Suplex for
the pin and- in case you forgot- Orihara ainÕt afraid to stink up the place. Afterward
Sasuke is too nice to Orihara and Ono and Tigermask and Delfin try make SasukeÕs big
noggin even lumpier. Delfin the enraged face may be enough to make this angle work.
Plus the fact that Crazy Motherfucking Max is gonna be on the scene helps. My favorite
part is when they show Sasuke doing the run-in at a Toryu-Mon show in Mexico, sealing
the deal with Crazy Max and you can see the big ESPN2 banner at ringside. Who do I
have to kill to get tapes of THAT?
Mr. Niebla/ Mano Negra Jr. vs Rey Bucanero/ Black Warrior:
In the Lucha-heavy Death Valley Driver Video Review #86 I will expound at length
(YES! Something to look forward too! WOO-HOO!) on the INSANELY great match Mr
Niebla had with Universo Dos Mil in CMLL in May so I still WAAAAAAYYYY on the
Niebla bandwagon. Mano Negra Jr has the look of a youngster who will actually be
everything that Mr Aguila didnÕt pan out to be so the technico side is ALLLL that, The
Rudos are the Pinnacle of Lucha Bumpmeisters with the kicker of Black Warrior, the
Future of CMLL- as he transcends the rudo role like certain Tijuana guys in WCW have.
Since this is CMLL in Japan, they always feel the need to- well, you canÕt use ÒNitro
MatchÓ anymore because Juventud vs Kidman #96 through #187 were all three times as
long as this so- make the matches really short for whatever reason. ItÕs one fall,
everybody cramming in some flashy stuff (Niebla wins this, with Black Warrior hitting the
best tope BUT THE FUGGING PHOTOGRAPHERS WERE IN THE WAY OF ME
SEEING THE IMPACT!!!) BW and Buccanero doing deulling Jerry bumps with Rey
winning with the one hand. Mano does a TRULY preposterously great Bouncy, Boingy,
Flipping, Jumpy elaborate armdrag that had me saying, ÒYESSSSSS, sweeeett Looocha!Ó
The rudos win with stereo Black Warrior Counterbalance Submissions! WOO-HOO!
Not NEARLY long enough.
Atlantis/ Lizmark/ El Hijo del Santo vs Pirata Morgan/ El Satanico/ Fisherman:
HOLY FUCK IS THIS GOOD! This match reminds me of a little story. My friend Kip is
one of my oldest and dearest and when we were both in college we would go out of our
way to give each other the most horrible gifts we could find for each others birthdays and
Christmas as many friends will do and so it was a steady stream of bad ceramic monkeys,
24 packs of Roughrider Condoms, assorted Close-Shave magazines until the day I came
across the hideous HAWK Cologne. It was rugged and manly and smelled like the
morning after drinking too much tequila so we gave each other the bottle of Hawk for
eight years until I finally lost track of. ANYWAY, Atlantis, El Hijo del Santo and
Lizmark donÕt have HAWK cologne, they have FISHMAN rudo, because the whole point
of the match was to disrupt the matural pairings of the match- since this was a VERY
traditional style match where you would usually get attached to one opponent and stay
with him- and PIN THE FISHMAN ON THE TECHNICO! Call me crazy, but isnÕt
Lizmark and Fishman AROUND the same age? Why is Lizmark still GREAT and why is
Fishman more like the lost Hermanos Dinamitas? Okay, heÕs a LOT better than THAT
but do you know what I mean? Am I Crazy? The problem for Fishman is that Satanico
and Pirata Morgan decide that THIS would be a good time to prove to the world who the
best really old school rudo is and thus Pirata works his ass off- including working a
SPECTACULAR sequence with Santo where Santo does a Hurricanrana into a
Off-the-shoulder-around-the-body Totally GREAT elaborate armdrag INTO an Off the
apron Hurricanrana on the floor and I said ÒWWELLL NOW!Ó Satanico says, ÒHold on
Grampa!Ó And goes at with Atlantis (also known as Lizmark Jr if your the total idiots who
slap together WCW Worldwide these days) on the mat and it is SWANK. Lizmark and
Santo have their own contest as Lizmark hits all the high-flying moves that everybody
stole from him to match the Santo Sequence and the Senton Into the Tope Spot that he hit
later. Lizmarks FAT ASS Plancha to the floor onto Pirata was about as spectacular as
anything Santo did, so this was old guys going hogwild and I loved it. GET ALL THIS!!!
#$#$#$#$#$ BRAZILIAN VALE TUDO CHALLENGE MATCHES
(byMIKE NAIMARK)
So you wanna move to Brazil, eh? Well then, you'll need to find yourself a hobby.
Popular ones include soccer, sunbathing, and dancing. And if none of that tickles you
fancy, you can always look at somebody cross-eyed and engage in the *other* national
passtime - beating the tar out of people. Brazilians have had a long relationship with what
they call 'Vale Tudo', literally free-fighting in Portuguese. Challenges occur at the drop of
a hat or with a misplaced wink at an unavailable lady, so it pays to be ready to rumble.
These imprompteau challenges are so common that hand-held videos featuring what are
literally Brazilian streetfights are common in the fighting underground, sometimes
featuring such reputable Vale Tudo fighters as Marco Ruas and Rickson Gracie smacking
the beejeezus out of poor saps in back alleys or on the beach. I call this particular tape,
"No-hold-barred Face Smashing", and in case you've ever really wondered how fresh
blood look sin black-n-white video, well, it looks like chocolate syrup.
Claudio vs Unknown fighter:
I only know Claudio's name because his buddies were chanting it during the fight. This
matchup occurs on the pavement outside of a club. The dance music from the club is
audible on even this grainy tape. Claudio looks to be around 5'10, 170lbs, while his
opponent is a huge hulk of a man, probably 6'4, 210lbs or more. The match is joined 'in
progress' as 'Hulk' is flinging wild punches which back Claudio up to the wall of the club.
Claudio drops to his knees, but not in submission; he grabs 'Hulk' around the ankles,
braces his feet against the wall, and pushes forward, taking the bigger man to the ground.
From here, Claudio takes the mounted position, sitting on the mans chest and proceedes
to beat the shit out of the larger man. With his back to the camera, Claudio fires a
dozen-or-so punches, with at least a few of them landing. Someone from the crowd
charges out and drags Claudio away (it must be a friend, since Claudio doesn't resist) as he
defiantly spits on his beaten opponent. I get the distinct impression that only the presence
of this unknown compadre saved 'Hulk' from being pissed upon. Winner - Claudio!
Rickson Gracie vs Machado Student:
The Machado Brothers are a respected pair of Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu instructors who also
dabble in combat with weapons (they appear in the crowd on my no-holds-barred
stickfighting video). They also have a running war of words with the most respected of all
Brazilian Jiu Jitsu instructors, the Gracie family. With Regan Machado visible in the huge
crowd surrounding this match, one of his students attempts to do what mere words never
could - shut the Gracies up. This 'match' takes place on the sandy shores of a Brazilian
beach during the lunchtime tanning rush; there must be over 100 people thronging around
this fight, and the cameraman gets rudely jostled more than once. But what we can see on
this tape is Rickson on his back, with the Machado student in his guard, trying like hell to
be the man who finally ends the Gracie's undefeated streak in no-rules matches. Someone
in the crowd leans over and starts yelling instructions to one of the fighters, and is
suddenly yanked back by his throat by an unknown member of the crowd, his eyes bulging
like Amos & Andy and his tongue protruding, stuck in mid-sentence. The comedic effect
of this can not be underestimated. Meanwhile, the student on top gets frustrated with his
inability to solve Gracie's legendary 'guard', and foolishly tries for a keylock armbar.
Quick as a flash, Gracie reverse his position and rolls over to a full mounted position. As
Rickson rears back to fire a wicked right hand, the student quickly and visibly taps out on
Rickson's chest. Rickson throws the punch anyway, cracks the poor sap on the forehead,
and stands with his arms in full 'Rocky' mode, while his supporter in the crowd chant his
name. Another day, another loudmouthed chump beaten down, and another notch in the
legend of the Gracies.
Bizarro Match - I don't know who these guys are. I don't know where they're fighting. I
don't know why they're fighting. What I DO know is that these two smaller men (5'8-5'10
by my guess) are masters in the feared art of Rochambeaux. For those of you who don't
watch South Park, this fight, which starts out with some unremarkable standup boxing and
leg kicks, suddenly degenerates into a crotch-kicking contest! WACK! THUD! WACK!
THUD! I was gagging after the first 'WACK' myself, but these guys really do have the
'Balls of Iron'! They just don't MAKE a cup strong enough for me to engage in this kind
of masochism. The nut-kicking ceases for a moment as the men return to punching, but at
this point its pretty clear that all of that scrotum-smacking has taken the spark out of both
men. Hell, I was pooped too, and I'm just watching it on tape. I'd like to see Ken
Shamrock take that kind of abuse. In fact, I'd pay $50 if Vince McMahon took on Eric
Bischoff in this kind of competition. One man finally lands a glancing right cross and
collapses on top of his foe, and they both lay on the ground, panting, as the tape ends.
The winner? You dear reader. For I guarantee you that there is not a man amongst you
who could watch this fight and not have it indelibly burned into their collective genital
psyche. This ain't some goofball Val Venis angle either. I think I need a drink.....
$%$%$%$%$% ECW TV (1/28/98-2/18/98)
(byPHIL RIPPA!)
I've had a horrible week so this is what I am reviewing to make my life easier. Next to
Rev. Ray, I probably keep up with ECW the most so call me masochistic. Anyway, I just
picked a couple of weeks from the stuff that I was cataloging for Dean and here you go.
Justin Credible vs. Gran Hamada:
Aaahhh, the wonderful period of time when Paul Heyman was bringing over all the
Michinoku Pro guys and then jobbing them out in like 45 seconds. This match takes place
because Credible (who is number three on the list of wrestlers who can't wrestle but
everybody on the 'net thinks they can. The other two would be The Rock and Hunter
Hearst Hemsley) injured The Great Sasuke so Hamada is looking for revenge and "to
teach the upstart 23-year-old some respect" (tm Joey Styles). Anyhoo, Hamada, who I
am convinced once put a headlock on John The Baptizer, hits all of his moves in about
two minutes. Old School Headbutts - CHECK. Top Rope Hurricanrana - CHECK.
Spinning DDT - Check. Credible kicks out of them all, which really pisses me off, and the
fun begins. Hamada misses a pescotta, "injuries" his knee, Credible hits the knee with a
chair, puts on Sasuke's mask and then pins Hamada with the spinning tombstone. Okay,
where do I begin. Well, the wearing of Sasuke's mask was cool but that was it. First off, it
amazes me that over the course of the year, Credible didn't cripple someone with his
sloppiness on the spinning tombstone. I understand and see how the result goes with the
story that Credible is a talented young kid who can beat the greats of wrestling; it's just his
attitude that everyone hates. And it works on that level. The crowd hates him, wrestlers
hate him etc.. What I don't like is pushing Credible to the moon. The whole story line
would work with someone who could actually WRESTLE. Before anyone starts yelling,
YES I have seen a lot of Credible matches in all of his incarnations (ex: P.J. Walker, Aldo
Montoya) and he has NEVER impressed. Not once. He might be a great guy and all or
he could really be an asshole. Either way, he can't wrestle. If this angle had been played
out with someone like Jerry Lynn (as a pick a name off the top of my head) it would be
really great. But alas its not and shortly it turns into a Tommy Dreamer/Justin Credible
feud. More on that later.
Sabu/ Rob Van Dam vs. Axl Rotten/Balls Mahoney:
Hey, Axl Rotten - I hate you (see MCW show). Meanwhile, you have Rob Van Dam who
I'm indifferent too but I know that Dean dislikes and Phil wants to see him dead (possible
just maimed, you have to ask him.) Sabu wrestles with a broken jaw and Mahoney is just
fat (that would be FAT, no PH anywhere to be found.) The match quickly turns into a
spotfest and it ain't good. Sabu does the requite clutching and grabbing, but for the most
part it is while he is on the apron. Van Dam, the king of fruity embellishment, lives up to it
with some weird somersaults and spins on normal kicks. Oh well. I am still trying to
determine which move I hate more- The Van Daminator or Rolling Thunder. See the Van
Daminator (the move that consists of Van Dam's opponent holding the chair in front of his
own fact while Rob kicks) EXPOSES THE BUSINESS more than any other move that I
can think off but Rolling Thunder (the move that consists of a slingshot legdrop from Sabu
while Van Dam hits a somersault splash) proves how stupid Van Dam can look with his
fruity embellishments. It is still a toss up because I hate both moves and they are in like
every single match. Eventually, after lots of wandering and some chairs shots, Sabu and
Van Dam hit Total Elimination. That brings Kronos out of the back since he is offended
by the use of his old finisher. The best is that the match ends with a DQ because Kronos
interfered. I can't remember the last time I saw an ECW match end with a DQ. Not that I
am complaining that this match ended but still. I guess all I am asking for is a little
consistency.
Al Snow vs. Doug Furnas:
If you are epileptic, DON'T WATCH THIS MATCH. They decide to show it in "Head
TV" which basically means that they spin the camera around a lot and the picture gets
shaky almost all the time. It is really annoying and gives you a headache (no pun
intended). Styles pops off a good line about how Furnas is a veteran of All Japan and
could you imagine the look on Baba's face if he saw the reaction to Snow and the heads. I
unfortunately couldn't come up with anything outstandingly funny so I will let you fill in
your own joke. Snow and Furnas work a really basic match that is on the slow side. I am
not minding it because it seems to be free of the typically ECW crap (minus the Head TV
stuff). But of course as soon as I think of this, the cut to a shot of Jenna Jamenson,
declare her the Queen of giving head, and then they go back to the match where Snow has
grabbed the Head, knocked Furnas out and gotten the pin. Good Old ECW. Oh, I almost
forgot. During the match, Styles claims that the reason that Furnas is not a huge star is
because the WWF was holding him down. I don't know but I thought it was because of
the injuries, steroid use and his general laziness. But Hey that is just me.
The Dudleys vs. Dreamer/ Sandman vs. New Jack/ Kronos vs. Sabu/ Van Dam:
Good morning class. Welcome to ECW 101. This match is the perfect example of ECW's
all of the board booking while they decide to push the boundaries of decency. (Of course
this is before the Dudleys start inciting the crowd to riot, so what the hell do I know.)
Dreamer's grandfather (the one who was supposedly very supportive of ECW) had just
died and the Sandman was paying tribute. Dreamer's bawling his eyes out. The Dudleys
are being classy, etc.. So they decide to do a 10 bell salute. All well and good. At about
8, Justin Credible gets in the ring, gets on the STICK and I quote, says "Tommy you
know that the only thing I wish is that it was you that died, not your worthless, stupid
grandfather." Yeah. Yeah for classy ECW. Dreamer attacks Credible. Everyone pulls him
off. Big ruckus. Yadda, Yadda, Yadda... Eventually, the Dudleys and Sandman/
Dreamer start the match (since it is supposed to be a tag match). So to pay tribute to
Tommy's grandfather, all the guys to WRESTLE. Bubba Ray, D-Von, Dreamer, the
Sandman for Christ's sake. Of course, the only moves the guys know are arm drags and
hip tosses but they aren't afraid to bust out like nine of the them. Somewhere along the
way, the say FUCK IT and just start a big clusterfuck of brawling (tm ECW). The
Dudleys taunt New Jack which brings out New Jack and Kronos to make it a three way.
New Jack brings the bucket of plunder which means all the wrestling is out the window.
Right? Nope, New Jack gets in the ring and squares of with Dreamer. Styles goes wild
about how this is a hardcore fans dream. They then proceed to trade headlocks, hip tosses
and arm drags. Man, I thought it was bad seeing the Sandman wrestle but New Jack was
MUCH worse. Oh well, Kronos taunts Sabu and Van Dam so they come out to make it a
four-way, because what would an ECW tag match be without it being booked six ways to
Sunday. Kronos and New Jack get eliminated when Sabu and Van Dam hit stereo leg
drops from the top rope. The Dudleys get rolled-up by Dreamer and Sandman to get
eliminated (see the wrestling wasn't done yet). Hey look, Justin Credible is back out
yelling at Tommy from the stage. Now this is the best, Credible starts mugging the injured
Mikey Whipwreck who was sitting up there. Whipwreck, who isn't involved, takes the
biggest bump as he gets kicked off the stage to the floor. A drop of at least 10 feet.
Needless to say, Dreamer leaves the match to go after Credible which allows Sandman to
get eliminated when Sabu hits an Arabian Facebuster while Van Dam hits a frog splash
(which is his one good move thanks to the height he get on it). So there was the big
tribute to Dreamer's grandfather. Aahhh, good old ECW.
&*&*&*&*&* THE BEST OF JERRY LYNN
(byREV RAY!)
Jerry Lynn vs Tom Burton:
The graphic says "1998", one of his earliest matches, so it's actually probably around 1989
or 1988. This is on "IWA" tv in a ring with super loose ring ropes. The most interesting
thing that be said about this is that these two would go on to work in the Global Wrestling
Federation. Burton wins with a clothesline in what's more or less a squash with Jerry
getting some minor offense in. Burton is no Stan Hansen.
Jerry Lynn v. "The Prophet" Ricky Rice (August '91):
This is from the PWA Wrestle for Shelter show which was some sort of benefit. Rice
basically acts like he's stoned, claims to be a holy man. The cool part is he comes out to
like an 8 minute Jim Morrison's strung out song, which fits the gimmick. Ricky spends
about 5 minutes getting to the ring, at one point going into the crowd, causing the
announce to proclaim "we've lost the Profit" when they can't find him. The camera man
also does a good job of shooting directly into the ring lights. Rice is probably best known
as one half of the "Top Guns" in the AWA. The announcers claim that Rice is as good as
Randy Savage and Curt Hennig. I try to figure out if this was the time the two were
working as announcers only due to injuries. The match is annoying as Rice will hit one
move, mug for the camera, play to the crowd, and generally waste time which drags the
pace of the match down. The is not very spectacular for a long peroid. Lynn hits a nice
top rope splash. Rice does a head scissor take down to the floor and dives off the top
rope to Lynn. Of course, the ring is maybe 2 feet off the ground. Lynn gets in some
offense after a Sattelite Head Scissors until he goes up top and Rice drop kicks him off the
top rope to the floor. Lynn gets thrown in by Rice, but Lynn recovers and answers with a
nice over the top rope plancha and then a top rope drop kick to the floor. Lynn gets
posted, Rice poses on the second rope and Lynn punches him in the head from the floor.
Given the height of Lynn, you now get an appreciation of how high this ring is. Rice low
blows Lynn, Rice misses a diving headbutt. Lynn starts working the leg and puts on a
Scorpion Deathlock which the announcers don't know how to call. Rice eye gouges out
of a leg lock, hits a nice powerslam for two. Lynn kicks out of a top rope sunset flip.
Rice continues the offence, throws Lynn outside. Rice hits Lynn with a box of programs,
puts the box on Jerry's head and posts him. They brawl into the crowd for a bit. They
head back in, Rice takes sort of a Flair Flip bump out to the floor, Lynn splashes him on
the floor off the post. Lynn ends up getting the win by turning a Rice clothesline attempt
into a crucifx. A so-so match. Given the dives, it was probably pretty state of the art for
US Wrestling '92, but the in ring offense lacked a bit.
Jerry Lynn vs JB Trask (August '94):
No DQ - This is from the first NPW show, "Sodbuster" Kenny Jay is the ref. The story is
that Trask has been threatening Lynn's family. Lynn busts out a Sattellite Headscissors
early and a tope con hilo. Lynn runs Trask's back into the post and goes for a pin. Of
course, it's on the other side of the ring, so you can't tell what happens, but Lynn sells like
he's been hit low. Trask works over Jerry on the floor, DDTs him on a chair for two.
They go back in, Lynn blocks a superplex, drops Trask off and hits a top rope drop kick
and after some more moves, a top rope splash. Trask takes over when Lynn misses a
corner drop kick. The announcers talk about things that Trask has used in matches, a
flame thrower gets mentioned. Somehow, I doubt that. Trask hits Jerry with a few chairs
and sets up a table. Trask hits an elbow smash off the apron as Jerry's hanging off the
table. Trask throws Lynn into a bunch of chairs. Trask brings Lynn up the bleachers, but
Jerry runs his head into the wall and then does a dive from the bleachers onto Trask. Lynn
puts a garbage can over Trask's head and drop kicks him down. They brawl back and
forth a bit, Trask gets his whip into an up ended table reversed. Lynn goes for a sleeper
which Trask jaw breakers out of. Lynn pulls out a moonsault body press onto Trask.
Trask kicks out and hits a desperation DDT. Lynn misses a body press and goes outside.
Trask misses a dive off the top rope. Lynn pulls Trask up onto the table and hits a
beautiful Jumping Powerbomb through the table for the win. This was a good match.
Jerry's added a lot more to his arsenel by this point and is real polished.
Jerry Lynn vs JB Trask (September '94) NPW:
This is a rematch. The announcers claim that they agreed to have a scientific match up.
Lynn controls early, working the arm of Trask. Lynn controls for a good 5 to 10 minutes
until Trask catches Lynn with a swinging DDT in the corner, which Lynn does a blade job
out of. Trask works the abdominal stretch hold the ropes bit which Mike Rotunda has
killed. They work a bunch of near falls as the 20 minute time limit runs out. Trask asks
for 10 more minutes, which Lynn accepts. Lynn attacks at the opening, but Trask takes
over with an inverted atomic drop and a clothesline. Trask works over Lynn, gets a two
with a foot on the chest cover following a piledriver. He goes for another, but Jerry
blocks it and back drops out. Jerry hits a sunset flip out of the corner for two. Trask hits
a body slam, but Lynn kicks him in the head from the mat, both guys sell being out for a
bit, Lynn gets a two after a bump heads spot. Lynn flips out of a suplex attempt for a two,
hits a nice DDT for another two. Lynn with a few leg drops for another two. Lynn with a
low level top rope splash due to the height of the ceiling. Jerry misses a corner charge.
Trask goes for a superplex, Lynn blows Trask, hits a low level top rope drop kick
followed by a nice tope suicida as the time runs out. Jerry beats on Trask with a chair and
atomic drops him on a chair. This was OK. They sort of killed too much time early on for
the time limit draw and I'm sure the low ceiling killed a lot of what they could do.
All and all, I don't know how much of a "Best of Jerry Lynn" tape it was. I've seen hand
helds of Lynn v. Lightning Kid, Sabu and other guys which are better than most of the
matches. The No DQ Trask match was probably the best of the batch, but the rest is so
so.
@#@#@#@#@#@ Jd' #30- 10/17/98, (taped 8/2/98- Korakuen Hall)
(byDEAN RASMUSSEN!)
Yabushita/ Fujiwara/ Obuchi vs Fang Suzuki /Ryuna /Hechicera:
Yabushita is a fabulous Judo Girl but she doesnÕt do much in this. Fujiwara gets some
nice stuff in- if she is the one in the surgeonÕs apron. This was pretty clipped and was all
about Fang Suzuki. HEY! There ya go!
Sakai vs Random LLPW youngster:
This looked like loads of fun but it was also clipped too much to really say. Sakai is my
favorite JdÕ youngster and she looks a little unsharp in this one, though she is doing more
high-flying now than neato Judo stuff like when Jaguar first unleashed her. I donÕt know
which LLPW gal this was but she seemed to be guiding the lil Sakai along pretty well.
Sakai misses then hits a moonsault after borrowing the swanky Fukuoka Forward
Somersault Dropkick which looked pretty great. I heart Sakai so this was a-okay to me,
though it was too clipped to actually figure out if it was any good or not. But we shall
review it anyway!
Cooga vs Mayumi Ozaki:
Cooga- one of the more mediocre wrestlers in the wild, wacky spectrum of all of
professional wrestling- takes on Mayumi Ozaki- one of residents at the very top of the big
old Bell curve of Professional Graps. Will Cooga drag down Ozaki? Your crappier
wrestlers do this type of thing. Will Ozaki take Cooga up to a higher level? Your TRUE
greats do that. This is right in between those two- mostly because Cooga is little crappier
than I remember. Oz dictates the whole match and realizes early on that all she can
POSSIBLY do with someone as limited as Cooga is kill some time until the end- when the
TWO moves that Cooga can do effectively (Kappou Kick, IÕm sure there is something
else) can make for a decent ending. Oz takes it to the mat and tries to figure out how to
work her way out of the this mess. Oz says... to herself...ÒCooga is basic heel. SheÕs
GOT to be able to brawl a little. IÕll pretend sheÕs a REALLY stunted Kansai.Ó Oz tries
to brawl with Cooga after realizing that Cooga canÕt do anything interesting on the mat
past the extended Sleeper that she getÕs on Oz and keeps on her until they are on the floor
for a while. The problem with the brawling attempt is that Cooga really SUCKS at
brawling. Oz is the FRICKING QUEEN of the Death Match. She can dish out and take a
beating with the best EVER but here sheÕs trying to get Shakespeare out of a Steiner here.
Oz throws her into a bunch of chairs and kinda makes that look of ÒCÕmon, Toots, DO
somethingÓ alot. They take it back to the ring and they go into the big finish with Oz
starting to lose control of the match. She leans into CoogaÕs sloppy Kappou Kicks
enough to make them look good but not enough to make them look great, so she doesnÕt
take them right in the face like she would if this was Kansai or Fukuoka or anyone else
who would have given her something to work with- IÕm guessing because Oz is
wondering if itÕs too late to be taking a beating to get this match over with the crowd to
any greater extent. Oz changes her mind and Cooga hits a nice Plancha that takes out Oz
and two rookies and Cooga hits another spinning kick to the corner. Oz kicks her in the
head and hits some nasty looking Uricans. Cooga counters out the Tequila Sunrise Suplex
a few times with some of the worst suplexes you will ever see. Oz hits Switch-hitter
Uricans for the win. It was positive stars if I were one to do star ratings, and there are
few Cooga singles matches that get past one star in my mind so this a moral victory for the
argument for the greatness of the beloved and great Ozaki, but you donÕt want to actually
SEE it unless you are a freakish JdÕ completist- so unless you are Dean Rasmussen or
Mike Lorefice, you have the Death Valley Driver Video ReviewÕs permission to lean on
that remote like a wild person.
Kyoko Inoue vs Lioness Aska:
Inoue and Aska had a strong Match of the Year Contender earlier in the year- Tim
Whitehead had sent it to Hangman Tim and Hangman Tim showed it on his public access
show and it was the coolest match of the year on Wrestling Power 98. Lioness served up
the psychology of the match to play to InoueÕs strengths while conquering InoueÕs urge to
try to do stuff that she is too heavy to do anymore. Inoue was ready, willing, and able to
take some INSANE looking bumps to get that match over as a beautiful synthesis of
mid-80Õs AJW Matsumoto-inspired garbagey brawling and 1990Õs bumps and some
ageless great psycholgy with- for one of the first times that I can remember- Kyoko
utilizing psychology that was PERFECT for her age- no stupid Manami Toyota
Comebacks, no cutesy playing to the crowd, just Kyoko Inoue maturing into the latter
days of her career as tough-as-shit ass-kicker getting into a total shitstomp with fellow
bitchy old ass-stomper Lioness. It was beautiful and ferocious and almost perfect. THIS
here rematch was a step backwards. Lioness doesnÕt lay down the law and do whatÕs
good for Kyoko- which is to save Inoue from herself- so Kyoko tries a LOT of stuff that
she simply cannot do anymore. This was still good for a lot of the way but it whenever
Lioness needs Kyoko to do anything complex at all- like frÕinstance, all the big finishing
spots take about three times longer to set-up and they try more table-oriented Tiger
Drivers in this one. The big bump off the top through the table off the floor which sold
Kyoko to the crowd as being tough enough to hang with Ass-stomper Lioness suffers
from diminishing returns as they hit the spot quite a bit more lacklustre this go round.
Add that to the fact that Lioness takes a great table bump a little earlier in the match and it
took a bit away from the physically limited Kyoko going through a table from the top-
though it was more of a triumph of the will for Kyoko to take the bigger bump. The parts
that worked and what made the earlier meeting so much better was when they stood in the
ring and beat the hell out of each other. This time it canÕt transcend the disparity of
ability- as the big difference in this match and the great one earlier is that Lioness
OBVIOUSLY is trying to carry Kyoko in this one and in the earlier match Lioness was a
lot more seamless in carrying her once-great, rotund opponent. Kyoko blows a finisher
she canÕt do anymore to fittingly bring this match to a close.
$%$%$%$%$% THE BEST OF LENNY LANE:
(byREV RAY!)
Lenny Lane vs Kamakazi Kid- Pro Wrestling Today:
Kid is listed as being 5'8" 170 on the NPW web page, but they claim he weighs 205 on the
tape. I guess he had a couple bricks in his pants during the weigh in. Kid is pretty young
and probably hasn't been wrestling long. Kid controls early, but gets thrown out and
posted- bringing forth a blade job. Lane takes over with a few suplexes until he misses a
corner charge. Kid pulls out a pretty nice frankenrana and leg lariat for two. Lane foot
saves after a flying clothesline. Lane with a nice powerslam after a series of counters on
the ropes. Lane takes a long time and misses a top rope splash. Lane side steps a Kid top
rope drop kick. Lane hits a not so good looking piledriver for two. Kid lands on top of
Lane following another piledriver attempt for two. Lane recovers and hits a stampede
powerslam for two. They go back and forth a bit, Lane takes over with some cheap shots
to the Kid's head and then hits something that might have been either a suplex that he
dropped Kid on his head or a brainbuster, I can't really tell. Lane gets the win with his feet
on the ropes.
Lenny Lane vs Kamakazi Kid:
This is a non-title match for Lane's PWA title, so I guess you know the outcome. Lane
controls early until the Kid clotheslines him out over the top rope. Lane comes back in,
Kid hits a monkey flip and works the arm. Kid works Lane over in the corner with chops
and kicks, but he misses an avalanche and falls out to the floor, where Mortimer Plumtree,
Lane's manager chokes him out. Lane throws Kid into the wall. Plumtree rans Kid's head
into a chair and the Kid is bleeding again. Plumtree goes for a fire extinguisher when
some old lady heads over so he decides not to. Lane works him over some more, throws
him in ring, does a skip around the ring into a cover for two. Plumtree with the JJ Dillon
Memorial Shot to the head. Lane gets a two following a clothesline. Lane with a half
hour suplex for two. Lane throws him outside the ring, Plumtree with a belt to the Kid's
head. JB Trask punches the Kid. Lane with a tope con hilo from the 2 foot high ring.
Lane with a cabbage patch on the floor. Lane with a clothesline and feet on the ropes for
two when the ref seees it. Kid with a sunset flip for two. Lane goes for another cover
with his feet on the ropes which the ref catches again. After a few back and forth
counters, the Kid hits a leg lariat. Lane works a sleeper. Kid fights out, Lane hits him to a
knee to the stomach. Lane goes for a superplex, but Kid cratches him on the top rope.
Kid runs Plumtree and Lane's heads together. Lane blades as Kid chases Plumtree around.
Kid works over Lenny, goes for a top rope splash, but Plumtree pushes him off. Lane
with another not so good piledriver for two. Kid back drops out of another attempt. Kid
does a moonsault body press for two. Kid gets a two after a german when Lane
accidentally hits Plumtree. Lane with a side slam for two, He goes for another and the
Kid hits a Sattellite Head Scissors for two and gets the win with a top rope sunset flip.
Lane says the Kid deserves a title shot after the match, and gets burned when the
commissioner says he has to defend against the kid next month. Better than the first
match.
"Dynamite" Dan Jesser vs Lenny Lane:
Lane stalls a whole bunch and does some mic work before getting in the ring. This is an
outdoor show in the shadows of a giant KFC sign and bucket of chicken. Welcome to the
indies. After five minutes of working the crowd, they finally tie up with Jesser taking
control. Lenny accidentally lands on Jesser during a leap frog. Jesser controls a lot of
this, but doesn't seem to be as good a wrestler as the Kid. Jesser and Lane post each other
about 3 times each. Jesser gives Lane a piledriver on the announcers' table. Jesser tries to
whip Lane into the broken table across the ring apron, but Mr. Dynamic, Lane's second
blocks it. Lane bumps the ref, Jesser gets pushed off the top by Dynamic. Jesser gets the
win when Dynamic accidentally trips Lane. Dynamic and Lane beat on Jesser until Horace
the Psychopath matches the save.
Lenny Lane vs Horace the Psychopath:
Lane is accompanied by his third manager on this tape, the Lusicious Lady. Lenny has
short hair and looks a bit like Shane Douglas, but I'll forgive him. Horace jumps Lenny at
the bell and dominates with bralwling tatics. Horace runs Lane's head into a stool and
drops an elbow off a stage. Horace hits a bite to the groin... that's a DVDVR first... and
follows it with a midget wrestling favorite... a bite to the ass. Horace uses the hernia
check later in the match. Horace bulldogs Lane onto the stage he jumped off of earlier.
Lane blades. Horace dominates until he misses a somersault senton. Lane works on the
back of Horace. Security does a good job of standing in front of the camera. They go
back and forth with Lane keeping the upperhand for the most part. Lane piledrivers
Horace out of the floor. Horace juices. Horace with the ode to Kawada and Tenryu kicks
and a super kick. Lane throws him outside and hits a tope con hilo with his foot grazing
the ceiling. Horace gets suplexed through part of a table. When they go back in, Horace
ends up banging his head on the stuco ceiling as he mounts the second rope, which had to
suck. Horace with a DDT and a somersault senton for two. He gets distracted by Lane's
manager, Lane hits a reverse DDT for two. Lane ends up getting the win after avoiding a
super kick and hitting a bulldog. This was pretty good. Horace, despite doing the crazy
babyface gimmick, had a bunch of good moves, especially for an indie guy and, thus, it
was pretty cool.
The final match on the tape was Lenny Lane vs the Great Sasuke which I reviewed in
DVDVR #68. This one was joined in progress, but if you want know about it, go to the
DVDVR archives... so there.
@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@
$$$$$$$ Johnny will f*ck you always and always -heÕs got the energy he will amaze
SINGLES GOING STEADY!!!$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$
@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@
$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ALL JAPAN-Mistaharu Misawa/ Toshiaki Kawada/ Hiroshi Hase vs
Akira Taue/ Jun Akyama/ Kenta Kobashi- 9/15/97: (SCHNEIDER)- This was a parjejas
incredibleas match where they mixed up the usual parings, teaming Misawa and Kawada
together for the first time in years. There is something different about sitting down for an
All Japan match you know is an hour long draw. There is no real suspense, you just get
yourself a Mr. Pibb, and some Tostidos and sit back cause you are in for the long haul.
This match didn't have the intensity of a title match or league final, the boys new they were
going "Broadway" and eased up on the headropping. The exception to this was Misawa
who still got his perquisite neck snapping. There wasn't too many memorable spots, the
best being Hase Giant Swinging Taue, and Taue dizzily trying to tag Kawada who pastes
him. Kawada kicked some people in the face, Kenta Kimala 3 Kobashi didn't no-sell
anything too bad, Akyama was all fired up, Taue was stoic and Hase didn't get smoked.
Not a must see All Japan match but pretty fun for fans of the league.
&&&&&&&&&&&NEW JAPAN- Jushin Thunder Liger vs Kaz Hayashi-10/17/98:
(RASMUSSEN)-Kaz Hayashi is absolutely KING-SIZED at playing one country against
another. Though a non-entity in the fucking clueless WCW, Kaz HAS stolen the best stuff
for export to New Japan since Bookerman Liger doesnÕt seem to want Juventud, Kidman,
or Rey around his little wrestling universe (but he wants Hayato Nanjo. Go Figure.) Kaz
busts out a 450 Splash and does two Juventud Springboards into a Rydeen Bomb and a
botched Springboard into a Shotay as Kaz busts out everything heÕs garnered from
watching as much WCW programming as the rest of us and since heÕs stealing everything
from Juventud I guess Juventud isnÕt going to Japan any time soon. Kaz fearlessly plumbs
the depths of his own arsenal hitting the UltraSWANK Toprope Jawbreaker and his
patented Tope Con Hilo Onto My Head. NJ gives this match 21 minutes but only show 9
minutes of it- which means NJ loves itÕs CruiserÕs 1/10 as much as the aforementioned
clueless WCW loves its cruisers because WCW doesnÕt know how to book... well,
ANYTHING.... but they do show LOTS and LOTS of really long Cruiserweight matches.
Liger doesnÕt get to wrestle the match he likes to wrestle these days because Kaz is
scrawnier than his regular boys- and thatÕs the key to Rey and the boys not wrestling
Kanemoto and Ka Shin any time soon- so Liger canÕt do powermove into dangerous
finisher into powermove, so he has to settle for selling KazÕs flying and they tread over
some NJ Jr territory as they do the Endless Corner Thing. They do the common ground
of the WCW/NJ Jr connection as they have a billion nearfalls at the end. They do the
irritating Japanese thing of Liger kicking out of a frickin Dragon Suplex and Hayashi
kicking out of a frickin Toprope Fisherman Buster. Liger kills him with a Shotay. I liked
the heck out of this match because it was Ligerrific and Hayashitized, but cÕmon- itÕs
Jushin Thunder Liger In with The Artist Formerly Known As Shiryu. I expect something
formulaic and pedestrian with Kaz in the US not with the best Junior in the world, AND
WE AS THE VEIWING PUBLIC GET THE OPPOSITE!. Kaz had a better match
against Juventud on Nitro a few weeks back. HELL, Juventud played to KazÕs Lucha
history a LITTLE for GodÕs sake. Liger had a perfect vehicle to show off his truly
amazing versatility and he settled for Acme Japanese Junior Match Kit #346273. I hold
Liger to a higher standard for about EVERYTHING, because he usually delivers more in
a match like this. I still liked it. I just didnÕt love it like I wanted to.
@@@@@@@ ALL JAPAN- Akira Taue/ Toshiaki Kawada vs Kenta Kobashi/ Jun
Akiyama-10/11/98: (RASMUSSEN)- This has three of the best workers in the world all
trying to carrying the Rubenesque Kenta Kobashi and- once again this year- Akira Taue
has to save the Porcine OneÕs bacon- so to speak. Kawada- the most psychologically
sound wrestler in the world before Misawa turned him into KobashiÕs whipping boy-
decides to experiment in selling as he lays around like the Great Muta at points- realizing
that he is dirt after facilitating another super lacklustre title reign by the Dean
Rasmussenly-bloblike Triple Crown Two-time loser Kobashi- face it, Misawa decided that
the people didnÕt want Kawada as the champ but the People decided that Kobashi is too
much of a total pansy to hold a title that Jumbo fucking Tsuruta once held. Akiyama and
Kobashi do a lot of cool stuff as a tagteam and Akiyama sells like Kawada does when heÕs
on, and since Kawada could give a shit anymore, Toshiaki ainÕt on here. Taue kicks
Kobashi right in the face really hard to cement his status as Last Hope Of The Doomed All
Japan Promotion. Akiyama does the Kawada sell for the finish, as he tries to no-sell a
Brainbuster of KawadaÕs by struggling to his feet only to stumble into a Jumping Spin
Kick when Kawada finally kills him- the same kick that didnÕt effect Kowbashi earlier in
the match. The other hero of the match is Akira Taue. Taue- though knowing full well
there is a really good chance HEÕs gonna be one who has to put Samson Fuyuki over to
make Lardass Fuyuki look like a contender for Misawa if things keep rolling along like
they are- works the stiffest, looks the most inspired and sells like a king for Akiyama. The
best parts of the match is Taue and Akiyama fighting it out to hit an Apron Nodowa
before Akiyama hits an Apron Exploider and the Swanky Taue DDT to the apron as a
compromise. Kawada and Kobashi have a long sequence that was pretty cool but was
also sad if you thought about it as the whole point was to get Kobashi over strong before
Kawada gets the obvious win over eternal also-ran and future Shottenheimer Kansas City
Chiefs of All Japan- Jun Akiyama. IÕm kidding. This was perfectly fine wrestling.
NEXT WEEK: CMLL! BATTLARTS! LLPW! NEW JAPAN! ALL JAPAN! MISAWA
vs KOBASHI! YOU NAME IT!
DEATH VALLEY PLAYBOYS.
I know that she cares about me- I heard her call my name...
The Velvet Underground
